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Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Courage and Bravery

In our lives we all do things which require courage or bravery. I think learning to walk starts off our acts of bravery. Wouldn't it be so much better to stay safe and secure in our parent's arms? We are held and cuddled, there is not much chance of us falling and getting hurt. But none of us are content to stay in the arms of our parents so we conjure up our courage and venture out on wobbly legs ~ learning to walk and then eventually run. As we grow up we go on needing more and more courage and bravery.

In all aspects of our lives, as we get older, we tap into our bravery and courage reserves. We wouldn't learn how to drive a car without it. None of us would leave the comfort of our parents' homes without being just a little brave. Courage is needed to make the monumental walk down the aisle when we get married. Even more courage is needed to bring kiddos into this crazy, crazy world. Every day of our lives we are faced with something requiring bravery or courage...most of the time it is on a much smaller scale, though, than what I illustrated above.

One thing I did recently which required a tremendous amount of courage was to have my jaw surgery. It was a completely optional surgery. I could have gone on for years more enduring the headaches, jaw aches and sleeplessness. I didn't NEED to have the surgery. I could have coped. I coped for years, taking vast amounts of ibuprofen. But that is not how I wanted to live my life. I wanted to be just a little brave so I could live life without my daily doses of ibuprofen to relieve my pain.

Here is the update on my jaw ~ how bravery got me started and courage is helping me finish...

In my adult life there have been more than a few intances which required more bravery out of me than this surgery and my path back into braces. Most of those situations were short lived, though. My surgery was in late January and I experienced more pain than I ever could have anticipated after I came home. My early blogs tell my tale through a drug induced haze. But after the pain of surgery and healing began I felt rejuvenated. My use of ibuprofen has dropped so much I am surprised the parent company of Advil has not noticed a sharp decline in sales. I used to take ibuprofen two or three times a day but now I take it so infrequently and it actually works to relieve pain...it's a miracle. I am free of pain but still need to tap my courage reserves to see me through the rest of this little adventure.

Now, I am faced with the daunting thought of how much longer I will be in braces. There are days when I catch of glimpse of myself in the mirror and I am mortified by my appearance. Most who know me know I can be a little vain. I like to look the best I can ~ everyday. Right now, I feel like a complete goober. I have this massive gap in my front teeth which is covered up by a fake third "tooth." I went in for an ortho appointment yesterday and I could STILL pose for the cover of "Hillbilly Weekly" without my fake third tooth. I love to laugh and smile but Zach will tell me I don't even look like I am laughing because things are so screwy in my mouth right now. It takes a lot out of me to venture out into the world sometimes, looking like this. I will be in braces until September or October of 2012...I didn't consider how long it will REALLY be. My courage reserves are being tapped in reverse.

In the grand scheme of life, when so many others are suffering through so much, my story is really is just a little blip on the radar and I know it but I am just telling my story. And in the grand scheme of my life, there have been so many more instances which required so much more courage out of me, when I was living the moment, but this circumstance is requiring a sustained amount of bravery to get through to the other side.

I think, though, I am showing my kiddos some good things through my little adventure. I think I am showing them to work through fear using courage so they can achieve a desired result ~ for me the desired result in this case is to live pain free. I think I am showing them sometimes it takes time and patience to get your desired result. And I think I am showing them how important it is to take care of yourself so you can be the very best parent(and person) you can be.


I am trying to be brave and courageous for the love of my children...

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